"IF ANYONE READING IS LIVING THIS LIFE"

Hello you. Yes, you reading this blog. I so desperately wish I could talk personally with each and every one of you. Is this your reality? Even bits and pieces? Narcissism can be and most likely is on a spectrum. Maybe all I've experienced, hasn't touched you. Or, maybe you're living with something more severe? You all matter to me. No one should have to live with abuse. We all deserve better. When I started this blog it was about healing. Taking my voice back. The Narcissist plays the perfect victim and Bill was no exception. Throughout the 2 years of our separation, he played it so well, he convinced the court to his side for awhile. Convinced the judge that I was the problem. Thank goodness in my case the truth came out in the end. Bill made 2 major mistakes. One, he got caught in 3 major lies to the judge. Two, we didn't have lawyers, so during our divorce trial, I was allowed to question him on the stand. Although he tried and tried to avoid answering my questions, after 20-25 minutes he had no choice and the truth came out. His fraud was exposed once and for all and I was granted lifetime spousal support. Of course in true Narcissistic form, "I'm a blood sucking leech." He'll never, ever admit to his lies and his role in that final judgement. That's not how they roll. A narcissist never accepts responsibility for their bad choices and bad behavior. That's okay. In the end, for me, it was about vindication in a court of law. I had moved past the need of validation or acceptance from him. I want to say something from the bottom of my heart to each and every reader, You are worthy, lovable, and you deserve respect. Leaving an abusive situation may seem scary, unthinkable, you may be afraid of being alone. You may have doubts regarding your abilities, etc... Please believe me, I had all those same doubts. I will not lie and say it was easy. Truth is, it was a bitch! There were days that were filled with sadness, doubt, and urges to just give up. However, somehow someway, I kept pushing on! I HAVE SURVIVED! I am strong! It took me 48 years to finally realize that about myself! Life has thrown it's best yet, I have survived it all. I am so happy, proud, and at peace. I AM WORTHY! I WILL NEVER ACCEPT LESS THAN I DESERVE AGAIN! I would like to invite anyone (female) interested to my community on Google+ "Finding The Happy Ever After" A safe, supportive, respectful community for females living with, leaving, or recovering from toxicity. Thank you for reading. God bless you all. I wish you peace! You deserve it.❤️❤️

"IT'S NOT ALWAYS ABOUT YOU"

Narcissists believe that everything in life revolves around them. During my marriage, Bill's wants and needs were ALWAYS top priority. How he was affected by circumstance was ALWAYS top priority. The last time I saw him was July 8,2013 I was forced to take him to court because he'd illegally stopped paying me money he'd been ordered to by the court. He'd also skipped the state without paying me the judgement from our divorce. To this day, he still owes me $1400. $500 that he stole from my auto insurance (which he cancelled against the court's orders) $900 that I was awarded by the court in back spousal support. I've long since given up on collecting. You see Narcissists live under this delusion that the law doesn't apply to them. Bill's 2 main goals that day in court were, as usual, based on his selfishness. He tried for the 4th time to get out of the lifetime Spousal Support I was awarded in our divorce. DENIED! He also tried to get the court to order me to remove this blog. "She's ruining my life your honor" Thanks to my wonderful 1st amendment rights, also DENIED! You see Narcissists of the world, it's not always about you! Go ahead and live under your false sense of selves. The truth is: Everyone matters! We all have wants and needs that, surprise, surprise are just as important as yours are. The real world sees it that way! Not the abusive, inflated sense of self bullshit cloud that you live under. The world that matters, where all the normal humans reside. So William Seamus McDonald shove your cocky, inflated, narcissistic, evil, asshole attitude UP YOUR ASS! Don't ever underestimate the power of the truth! Oh sorry, you wouldn't know the truth if it bit you on the ass. Enjoy your screwed up delusions and your inflated ego! I'm just fine! In the real world! :-)

"HAPPY 51ST BIRTHDAY WILLIAM SEAMUS MCDONALD formally known as WILLIAM FRANCIS CONNEARNEY"

Well 4 birthdays now that we've spent alone. No big deal! Lord knows, that even though mine is only 6 days after you, not once did you ever remember mine! Anyways, I'd like to take this occasion to thank you. Four years ago on 9/15/2011 when we split for the final time, I thought my life was over. I'd lost Ahmi my heart and soul and you. I thought I'd hit the bottom. Little did I know, you were just getting started. Trying to kill me in May of 2011 was just the beginning for you. Starting that September and continuing throughout the 2 years of our separation, you gave it your all in trying to destroy me. You pulled out every filthy thing you could trying to crush me! As I look back on the last 4 years, I'm proud, grateful, and so blessed! Despite your greatest efforts, I've survived, thrived, regained who I once was! Alone I walked through the fires of your hell AND CAME OUT STRONG! I survived abuse, lies, loneliness, anger, fear, pain, devastating sorrow, devaluation and hatred. I emerged a strong, loving, and compassionate survivor! That feeling is PRICELESS! I'm sure that you are exactly as you were. As you'll always be. How sad is that? Thank you for the gifts you've given me. Because you trying your best to destroy me...Turned out to be the greatest gift you ever gave me! Happy Birthday William Seamus McDonald formally William Francis Connearney!